Valentine's Day will be here on Tuesday. I wanted to write a holiday poem, continue with my woodcut print series, and, I was feeling a little snarky. This is the result:
Click on the image to enlarge. © Diane Mayr, all rights reserved. Source of the woodcut illustration.
Advice for the Modern Woman
If there's snow don't look for love,
for arrows won't fly true.
Wait for hyacinths to bloom
with all their sweet perfume.
Gently bend to take a whiff.
Present Eros with a target.
One that is too broad to miss
by a flying little god-let.
If, perchance, he misses the mark,
love wasn't meant to be.
Sue the god for incompetence,
then earn your Ph.D.
I've been forcing hyacinth bulbs indoors. So far, two have bloomed and two more are shooting up nicely. (I've posted about hyacinths many times in the past, look for the label on the right.) I suppose if the modern woman leans over a bulb being forced on the windowsill, Cupid could take aim. Still, it's nicer to be in love, outdoors, in the spring.
Katie at The Logonauts will be hosting the Round-Up this week. See you there!
You are too clever.
I especially love the last tine.
And the artwork.
Appreciations with more bulbs blooming on top,
Poor outdoor bulbs are getting a real blanketing of snow.Delete
This is wonderful Diane!! So glad I'm not in pursuit of cupids arrows, artful touch at the end, touché!ReplyDelete
Yes, there are many of us who are not in pursuit!Delete
HA! Oh dear, I fear I would give Eros far too much to aim for if I were to bend and smell the flowers! ;-) So very glad I'm not depending on any cupid these days! ;-)ReplyDelete
Sitting at a computer all day has given me a much bigger target!Delete
Thanks for the laugh. The last line made me especially giggle because I'm in the last weeks of my doctoral thesis and tearing my hair out over it.ReplyDelete
Best of luck in the home stretch, Sally!Delete
This is one of your best!ReplyDelete
Thank you, Julie!Delete
I love the ending! Good luck with your hyacinths. I should probably peek in my flower beds. With the warm winter we've had, I might find some green surprises.ReplyDelete
I had a strange thing happen. One of my forced bulbs that had gone by, showed a little green to the side of the dying stem. I cut off the dying stem and there is a new shoot coming up. Do you thinks there's enough nourishment in the bulb to make another flower? I'll have to wait and see.Delete
Someone brought a few hyacinths to the bookstore, and it has perfumed the store for about a week now. Love the snarky final two lines. I wish every young woman would get that degree!ReplyDelete
Hyacinth fragrance can be a bit overpowering if you don't like flowery scents. I love it, though!Delete
Brava, Diane! Love your snark and wit. The woodcut is wonderful, too, as is your choice of font.ReplyDelete
Isn't that woodcut great? I just had to use it!Delete
LOL Good advice! I'll be careful as I bend to sniff. :-) Love the last line.ReplyDelete
Love the contrast between sweet woodcut print and snarky poem!ReplyDelete
The contrast is even greater since I added the pink!Delete
Oh goodness, I love this! Never did fully trust those flying little god-lets. They're cute, but a bit full of themselves.ReplyDelete
And really, how do they fly with those impossibly small wings?Delete
Very funny - and good advice, too! Even better...earn your PhD first, THEN show the little god-let his target!ReplyDelete
First sue and win a big cash payment. It's the only way to afford an advanced degree these days!Delete
Diane, this is terrific! I love hyacinths as well. I wonder if it's too late to force them indoors. As others have said, those last two lines are perfect.ReplyDelete
This might be the end (I've found the best time to be between late November and early February), but you may be able to if you start today.Delete
Bwahahahahahahaha! Snarky, indeed! Love it the poem and your sense of humor and fun. Viva la PhDs. Have a great week...so neat to see the woodcut art. I really love that you are working on a series of poems illustrated by the art. Very cool.ReplyDelete
Thanks, it's been fun coming up with words to go along with the prints.Delete
Oh,that last stanza! So funny!ReplyDelete
Glad you like it!Delete
Diane, this poem hit the trifecta: the design is attractive with a good match to the verse; the verse is witty; the flow leads right to the twist. Go women!ReplyDelete
Indeed, we're going! We're on the march.Delete
Wonderful. Love the art work coupled with the poem. And the twist at the end was delightful.ReplyDelete
Thank you, Alice!Delete
You put this together so well, Diane, down to the font.ReplyDelete
I'm very fond of the font, but there's not much that I can pair it with. I had some qualms about using it here, since the time periods reflected in the print and text are literally hundreds of years apart.Delete
Your poem and mine are sisters! **fist bump** **high five** **boogie dance**ReplyDelete
Except that yours is hopeful and mine just sounds snarky! (But, that's me.)Delete
Those last two lines! Yes - the power of persistence.ReplyDelete
Persistence and resistence.Delete
Ha! Love. Here's to snarky women!ReplyDelete
Thank you, I'll take it!Delete
Ha and ha again! Has anything pricked YOU as you bent to sniff your hyacinths? : ) Love it love it love it.ReplyDelete
No pricking, but I have had a cat nip at the back of my leg when I was leaning over her dish and not scooping out the cat food fast enough!Delete